Sunday, September 12, 2010

Mardi Gras 2005 ~ MAKEUP!

As I said yesterday, I received a bunch of responses to my Craigslist request for someone to do my makeup.

1. a guy who said he has a (male) friend who does makeup ~ really not interested! Makeup, pedicures, manicures, massage all have a wonderfully stimulating component if they're done by a nice female. I've even enjoyed back waxing, when done by the right woman.
2. a pro who will do an 8 hour session/lesson/personal shopper for $300 ~ really promising, especially for Sunday. I thought I'd be overloaded by party time though.
3. a pro who said "I don't need the money; can I put you in my portfolio?" ~ this sounded really intriguing! But she had to do this at her house and the timing was wrong.
4. someone who said she was "just good" at makeup and that she'd do a session for $50 at my house but we haven't discussed cost for session/shopping (but she's willing) ~ very possible
5. a "what are you willing to pay?" e-mail ~ I wasn't interested in THAT attitude!
6. someone who was willing to give me some e-mail or phone hints & tips if we can't get together ~ OK, that's nice but I needed "hands on". This was my second public attempt, and I needed help, advice, and someone who could colour inside the lines.

I know there were seven, but I can't find any old e-mails regarding #7.

I was writing to numbers 2 and 4, trying to arrange Saturday and maybe Sunday too. The pro wasn't returning e-mails and I had a good conversation with the other woman. Her name was Melinda. I mention her name because, well, I really like that name.

I was very upfront with everyone. I explained exactly what I wanted to do, and bent over backwards to make sure they'd be comfortable with me. These were among the first people I admitted I was a crossdresser to. I knew that someone is going to have my address, and it's easy to get the homeowner's name, and this could be a big mistake, but adventure is always risky. This isn't skydiving or hitchhiking through Europe, but it is an adventure.

I was having a hard time getting in touch with the pro (#2 above). Melinda was easy to reach and we wrote back-and-forth a bit until I was pretty comfortable with her.

We agreed to meet at a CVS so she could look at my makeup and buy what I was missing (I don't recall if we needed anything). She also wanted to see me before coming to my house. I think she also wanted to look for the I AM AN AX MURDERER tattoo on my forehead. I gave her my cel number, my real name, my business web page (with that same cel phone number on it) so she'd be comfortable that I was what I said I was. I pointed out that I'd probably find some line that would get more responses if I wasn't serious about this.

We met at CVS at 3 for a 7pm party. She noticed I lacked the tattoo so we were good to go.

Before we met, I shaved extra-close and I shaved my upper chest, arms, and legs. This was new. When I write about my first time out, I'll post a picture or two and you'll see I was wearing a high neck blouse, long sleeves, and tights. I shaved my hands, but that was it.

Melinda looked at my clothing choices, wig options, makeup options, jewelry options. She not only helped with my makeup, she combed out a wig or two that she wanted me to try, picked out jewelry, and had me model a couple of outfits.

I did everything Melinda asked. She had final word on makeup, wardrobe, hair. I didn't like her choice of wig, but I didn't argue. I do think this was my only time out with that wig. I forget where I got that one; the wigs I preferred were from Paula Young (mail order). I still hadn't braved the wig shop to buy my own yet.

Some of the makeup ladies let me video their work. Some didn't. I'd have to look through my old tapes to see if Melinda did. That means I need some time when the family is OUT. If I find a video, I'll see about transferring it to the computer.

I didn't have time to eat before the party, but I knew they'd have some party nosh so I wasn't too worried. I had plenty of other things to worry about. At least, going to the ladies' room wasn't among them. :)

I knew a few of my political friends would be there, and I found out that my state representative, who knows me pretty well, would be dropping by on his way to Richmond.

I know I was nervous until I met Melinda. I think once I decide to go forward, an internal calm takes over. I can do my makeup without a trembling hand, my heartrate is normal, it just feels right. It's been like that ever since I started going out. Even that Halloween 18 months earlier, once I decided to change I was calm.

But going out wasn't ensured anyway. I could write off the $50 as an afternoon's entertainment and makeup lesson. Even after she does the makeup and all, I could still wave goodbye and sit at home all evening.

I also knew I wouldn't.

And I didn't.


  1. Loving this narrative...can't wait for the rest!

  2. Meg
    Reading this post, as well as some of your other ones that discuss the efforts you have been making to get out of the closet and out the front door of your house has made me ponder the unique, dual commponent, male/female aspects of being a cross dresser.

    To some extant we are dealing with our desires to present as female and there may be a component of the female side that seeks affirmation BUT I tend to think that it is the male component of our personalities that impel us out the door.

    As a rule, and of course all rules are made to be broken, it is the male who is willing to take risks. It is the male, testosterone fueled, personality that will press forward on a dare, knock a chip of another's shoulder, brawl in the street, press the metal to the floor, live life on the edge, etc..

    I believe that there is more of the adreneline junkie in the male persona than the female. If it were only our female side, which seeks safety, security, certainty, acceptance, etc. then none of us would ever get out of the house. We would be satisfied with dressing for our own amusement, pleasure and entertainment. We would not do anything that would entail risks.

    On the other hand it is our male world view that enables us to get dressed, get out of the house, go to a TG meeting, fly across country, shop, bar hop, whatever. We know, no matter how good we look and how well we may pass in general, that there is always the risk of getting clocked. It is the male side that will take the risks in order to get that rush of adreneline. High risk/reward motivation is part of being out in public while dressed.

    We all hear about mothers telling their sons to wear clean underwear in the event that we are injured in an accident...not their fathers. Underdressing, getting fully dressed, whatever, takes that maternal admonition to the next level. In your role as father you are naturally concerned with the safety of your children but have you ever double checked on the cleanliness of their underwear?

    It may be our female side that compels us to dabble in dressing but it may well be the male side that enables us to take the risks involved in getting out the door.

    Just a thought on my part inspired by reading your adventures.



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