Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Almost Told

There's a woman in the office who I will call M. Like most of the people here, she doesn't know.

She missed Meg's visit last Halloween, but my manager sent a couple of cel phone pictures to the group members so she knows what she missed.

She mentioned my Halloween "costume" on a number of different occasions. I wonder if she suspects and is looking for confirmation, or if she's just kidding around. She's like that (like me). After once lamenting that she wasn't in that day, I showed her my badge pictures. I made two ~ one for each side of the badge holder. I'm wearing different wigs in each photo, and different tops in each. If someone thought about it, they'd immediately suspect that this was more than a one-day thing. A couple of people mentioned on the day I was dressed that I was wearing a different top in one of the pictures and how many outfits do you own? I just said "it's easy to borrow a shirt" and that satisfied them.

Yesterday M was wearing a black mid-sleeve v-neck dress. I complimented her on it and she said "maybe you could borrow it sometime".

Now, I don't recall if I did one of my "nice dress" -- "thank you" -- "can I borrow it sometimes?" routines with her or not. I've been known to do that.

So I said "thank you, but I don't know if it'll fit." She said "probably not. There's not a lot of support. You'd probably need to wear a shirt underneath". I said "I'm sure I have a cami that would work". She said "I'm surprised you know what that is". I replied "I do my research! Besides, I wore one under my dress last year. I thought the neckline would show too much."

Now, I don't think I did wear a cami, but she wouldn't know if I had one underneath or not. I didn't mention that I was wearing a slip. :)

M said "either you did your research or you shop too much" and I said "well, it could be both" and at that point she had to go talk to someone else while he was in the office.

At any point in the conversation I could have said "you don't really think that was the only time I did that, do you"? That would have definitely 100% confirmed that I crossdress. She might ask if I'm serious, but that's pretty unambiguous.

Or I could have said "the hardest part was figuring out which dress to wear" or "you should see my closet!" or something like that ~ she'd probably take it as a joke and move on.

But I almost told. I think she'd be good with it, but I'd also vote her the Girl Most Likely To Blab.

But I might still tell. But I shouldn't.


  1. I'm at a point where a lot of people do know, and I'd be very tempted to tell the person most likely to blab. Of course, once the genie is out of the bottle, there's no putting it back, so you've got to be sure that you're ready to be out. :)

  2. She'll tell two friends. And they'll tell two friends, and they'll tell two friends, and they'll tell two friends....: ;)

  3. Meg
    Humor is a wonderful approach to many things. It is always fun to leave them wondering how much of the exchange is fact and how much is leg pulling.
    If you do decide to come out to 'M' I would do it in private and keep the humerous edge but also let her know that you are bringing her into your private world because you like her and trust her to keep your confidence. Otherwise, to take off on what Alice said' it may not be possible to shove the toothpaste back into the tube.

  4. If I know anything about office gossip, she probably has a fair idea, and was fishing for confirmation. You may be surprised at how many people have joined the dots on this one.

  5. But, Claire.... If only they'd ask, I'd tell them. OK, maybe I'd tell them.

    It's a paradox. I wouldn't mind if people know, but I don't want to just come out and tell them. And if they ask, I'm still not SURE I want people to know.

    If the secrecy of crossdressing isn't insanity, it's certainly on the path. :)

  6. Meg- wow. Quite a story... I guess she pretty well suspects, huh? Just worried she's a blabber... but I guess you have it well in hand!! :)


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