Sunday, October 9, 2011

That Clothing Swap III

Lynda and Shannon
As an aside, twice in the past couple of weeks I wrote a post and forgot to actually post it, which is why you early birds and Brits and Ozzies didn't see a post on time.  I'm in the midst of a cold right now, and I'm gonna use that as an excuse for my latest error.  No excuse for the other one, but I'll think of something.  Probably after I'm through with this cold!

Another aside: my toenail looks horrid, but it doesn't hurt to put pressure on it.  I tried on some shoes the other day, and they felt OK.  Since I still have exposed under-toenail-skin I don't think I can get a pedicure but...

So I pulled out of the garage and no-one was around.  I drove the same way as I do to work, because the Shoppers Food Warehouse where I was going to buy soda and ice is less than a ten-minute walk from my office.  I was mildly worried that someone from the office might see me, but that's always a possibility and I live with it.  Sometimes, I hope I'll see someone.  Other times, not.  Still others, I don't really think about it at all.

Stylish Swappers I didn't chat with :(
At the supermarket, I got a couple of smiles and I smiled back.  Does that mean I was read?  I don't really care.  I'd rather not be read.  I think they enjoyed my outfit and how stylish I looked.

Read or not, to me I was just another woman shopping that day.  And most shoppers, as usual, ignored me.  The cashier was helpful, getting the ice out of my cart for me, which was nice.  I did notice he refrained from saying "ma'am" or that other gender-specific word.  Maybe he always does that.

Someday, I hope to get a "Miss."  I'm not hopeful though.

By the time I got to the swap I was already sweaty.  Kim had just arrived and her husband was unloading the car.  I took out my stuff, making several trips with the soda and ice and getting wetter each time.  The air conditioner inside was either off or really weak ~ it was hot, and as women arrived in waves it just got hotter.

Before I went to the swap, I challenged myself: I was going to speak with random people at the swap.  I didn't set a goal, but I was going to start conversations with strangers.  This is harder than going out dressed, for me.

I did it.

As I wrote earlier, I told the woman with the polka dot shoes that she had the best shoes at the swap.  I commented on clothing women picked off the tables or racks, if I was nearby: "that's beautiful!"  "I wish I could find something like that in my size" "that would look great on you!"  "I love your earrings."

And so on.

Sometimes I got a small smile and nothing else in return.  Sometimes I got a warm welcome and some nice conversation.  Shannon and Lynda, pictured here, were friends who came together and Shannon, in particular, was gregarious and friendly and treated me like any other lady.  They posed for this picture.  Lynda is a swap member and she brought her friend with her ~ I'm glad she did.  I think whenever Meg is out and feeling good she meets at least one woman like that.  And at the swaps, if no-one else is around I know Kim will be, and she's one of the most outgoing women I know.

One funny thing: one woman approached me and asked me to delete her photo.  We chatted a bit; she doesn't like her picture taken.  I don't know why she wouldn't.  She's a nice looking woman, in her 40s maybe.  I deleted her picture and later told her that I was carefully watching for her and ensuring she wasn't in any pictures.  She apologised for her "quirk" and I said I'm glad she told me.  Oh... for those who were wondering, when we first spoke I carefully noted what she was wearing so I could find her later.  You know I'd never recognise her after that first encounter otherwise!  And that's my quirk!

There was only one other t-girl there and we spoke a tiny bit and I asked her if she wanted her picture taken; she said no, so I avoided her too.

I respect all comfort levels, even as I encourage people to step out of theirs and I step out of mine.


  1. Hi Meg , I have gotten a Miss Or Lady a few times. Having someone refer to you as she or her what a rush!
    hugs Diane

  2. If I get a Miss then I know that they are not observent, I always wear my wedding ring, I do get a real buzz from being called madam, love, etc. I don't think that thrill will ever fade.

  3. You know, Meg, that's one of my big terrors too: interacting with people. And I have to do the same thing you do: make goals. Because I am not as practiced as being out and about as you, I have to take baby steps. Reading your experiences gives me comfort and hope.

  4. Meg- you are soo bold! Lynda and Shannon sound great. I went to one of the Springfield swaps, but was totally intimidated by all the real women there (sigh!)... So impressed by you!


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