Friday, July 22, 2011

Classy DC Sisters

Please take this week's poll.  Read the introductory post first, and please take your time!  I know it's long, but I believe it may help you understand yourself.

Before I go on, I want to say I'll be doing regular posts this weekend.  With the polls and going out soon, I have some topics and I don't want to get too far behind.

As I said yesterday, I've belonged to the Classy DC Sisters yahoo group for over a year.  It's for girls who like to go out and be seen.  They mostly go to one of the two local gay clubs and sometimes to t-events in the area.  Sometimes, they go to other friendly clubs or bars.  Generally, they go out Sunday night and that's almost always impossible for me.  Not this year.  The family is scheduled to go away on a Sunday and I'll have to see if the group is going to the club that night.

There are some problems:

I'm not a drinker.
I'm not a dancer.
I'm not a club girl.

I don't know how comfortable I'd be there.  I have problems hearing over background noise, and I suspect the club is noisy.   Weddings and such are bad for me, partly because it's a stretch for a classic introvert to talk to strangers, and partly because I can only hear the person next to me.

The sisters regularly post photos of trips out.  I haven't gone through them all, but from the photos I've seen, they dress Ready To Party.  This is not a criticism ~ they look great!  It's just that they dress sexier than I ever have, even when I was just staying at home. 

So I don't know. 

Plus, if someone saw me come home wearing a skirt, well, that's a bit of a problem.  If someone saw me come home at midnight in a sequined micro-mini skirt and five inch pumps, well....


  1. I believe you MUST go! There's going to a lot of conversation that will be great, and helpfull, you really need to get out with friends. just order a soda, and enjoy!! you always, can leave on our own time.
    I'd take a long coat, if you think somebody (around your home) might see you! And the garage door operator!

  2. -- Introverts are not built to survive environments of over-indulgence unless they intend to over-indulge themselves (which I do not recommend). Unnecessarily loud music, overly-crowded rooms, and people who don't know when they've had one drink too many doesn't sound like a particularly good time to me. I vote for something ... quieter.

  3. Anon, you definitely understand what introvert means. I have skipped events I was looking forward to because I spent too much time in the pre-event "happy hour." Too many people, too much noise. Just standing there causes stress.

    Introvert: people sap energy.
    Extrovert: people generate energy.

    And then there's everybody else.

  4. Meg, I'm a classic introvert, too (a bit less so as Linda). Having said that, if my family was going to be gone on Sunday night and I had a chance to go out with a nice group of girls, I would definitely be there.

    There was a group called the Island Girls that met at a gay bar only about 5 miles from my home. They recently disbanded and I only had a chance to attend their "socials" a few times, but they were wonderful experiences.

    The socials were at a bar, it was kind of loud and many of the girls were dressed for a club. However, the club was pretty low key so even with many girls dressed up, there were others who were dressed less formally and even a few girls who came in business or business casual attire.

    The best thing about the Island Girls was how willing they were to take in a newbie like me. They were so welcoming and so nice to me. It's great to be out almost any time, but to be out with a group where almost everyone goes out of their way to say hello and tell you how nice it is that you were able to come, well, that was the best. I am not skilled with makeup and have to admit that I don't present very well. I've heard about some groups where the girls' attitude to someone like me would be "come back when you know what you're doing" but the IG girls overlooked my appearance and made me feel very welcome.

    It was a little loud and a little difficult to talk at times, but that was a small problem compared to how much I enjoyed being with the IG girls.

    I don't know if the Classy DC Sisters are anything like the IG girls, but it seems that in most groups, there are usually a few introverts that are glad to find other introverts so together they can watch those who are the life of the party and enjoy the show from the comfort of the background.

    Not that I'm saying you should go or anything. :)

  5. If you can go out then get out. Wear what you feel comfortable wearing. I think the hardest decision may be whether to wear pantyhose or not with the weather this weekend on the east coast nearing triple digit temps.
    Savor the angst that GGs go through when deciding what to wear to an 'event' but don't sweat it too always look fine.
    Have fun and let us know the details.

  6. Meg-

    here are some suggestions and thoughts.

    Try it!
    Have FUN!

    Pictures (and yahoo group posts) don't necessarily tell the entire story.

    The experience is what YOU make it. You can visit and find out that (e.g.) there is one great person you've finally met face-to-face, you're talking with her, and its in a (relatively) quieter corner. Or not.

    Revisit some of your past experiences and decisions - they should help you. Was it a challenge to get out to dinner in CO Springs with a relative stranger, and worth it?

    Was it worth the challenges visiting the museum in Tucson? Is loudness any different than extreme heat?

    Clubs can be daunting, awful, loud, obnoxious.... and awfully fun, intriguing and different!

    You've got an opportunity to check it out. Why not go? Enjoy, and... have a backup/bail plan if no one shows (been there), crowd/place doesn't fit (done that). You know you already have one ;-)

    Caveat emptor, YMMV, yada yada and all those quals.

    -Joanie in Denver

  7. Oh, Meg, go...just where what you're comfortable in. Based on what you've posted here, you have a number of nice dresses that would work for such an event. Remember, you don't have to be the center of attention; in fact, you don't want to be.

    How about that sleeveless print sheath that you posted when you were planning the AZ trip? That ought to work with a suitably dressy pair of heels.

  8. another classic introvert here - What you described, Meg, fits me pretty well. Don't drink, dance or "do" clubs, don't like lots of noise, have trouble having conversations with people (and even more so in noisy settings).
    I agree that if you do go wear what you want, and have a backup plan/exit strategy just in case.
    A long coat might not work in the heat wave, but maybe some trousers you can change into before you get back home?

  9. Meg,

    I am a long-time member of Classy DC Sisters and the group experience has been great for my confidence. Many of the members aren't "party girls" at all but enjoy being out and about. I don't drink and wear hearing aids and I have found most of my best friends at group functions.

    Contact Cindy Tease if you would like to meet a few of the sisters in a less busy venue than Freddie's.



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