Playing Gay-mes

OK, I'm behind.

Before going out

I went to the GLBT gamers meetup over a week ago.  When I arrived, the organiser was there and he directed me to a table where a game was just starting and they had room for a third player.  The guy at the table was teaching the game to a woman at the table and I introduced myself, sat down, and we started playing something called "Global Thermonuclear War."

No, not really, but I bet most of you know where that one came from.  We played a game called "Manhattan Project" which was interesting but I made a tactical error and chose to keep the teacher off-balance while the other player succeeded in her goal. 

While I was playing a couple of adults and some kids sat down at the next table, playing Risk.  A third table was formed by three guys playing "Ticket to Ride," which had something to do with Beatles trivia. 

Showing Charity's artwork (eyes)

Again, no, not really.  It had something to do with building railroads and it looked a lot simpler than building atomic bombs (which is what we were trying to do).  I would have stayed for another game of something but I had to change and get my son later that afternoon.

What was missing was any attention or comments because I was dressed.  Not even a look from the kids.  Not even a comment on how cute my outfit was.  Ah well.

I wanted to get pictures of Meg playing, but I wanted to respect the privacy of the other players.  I don't know if they all fit under the GLBT umbrella, or if some came because, well, it's hard to find people who want to play Manhattan Project.  But anyone in that room might have been uncomfortable with being associated with a GLBT group, to outsiders who might stumble upon my blog.

The big picture

As t-girls, I think most of us can be confident that if our photograph was published it might be identified as a guy, it most likely wouldn't be recognised.  But the men and women there are not "in disguise," as I was.

Next time, I'll ask.  But that's for next time.


The fact that they joined a specifically GLBT group instead of a generic gaming group implied that part of the goal was to play, part was to be with community members.  And, of course, the gender community is different from the orientation community, but I wasn't treated as an intruder.  I was treated as a gamer.

But this time, Meg was out with a group she has never been out with before ~ always hard for me, whether male or Meg.  I interacted freely, which is something I'm still becoming comfortable with.  There was zero discussion (at least while I was there) of anything but games, which was cool.

Every outing, every interaction boosts confidence.  Right now, I'm not sure what I'm looking for, as Meg.  I can't be sure if I'm looking for new experiences, or to do Things I'd Enjoy as Meg.  There could be a problem here: there is a limit to the number of new experiences I can have.  If I decide gaming is something I'd like to do regularly, I can go again and again ~ every time out is different anyway.

Style note: Charity picked up the sweater and skirt for me.  She wanted to check out a new Goodwill that opened along her work/home route.  I was looking for a winter/casual look and I think this worked pretty well ~ well enough that I considered it for my next outing but changed my mind at the last minute.  Charity also did my makeup.  For my next outing, Charity had to work late so I did my own face, which is good.  I need practice, but it's hard to pass up an offer from Charity to work her magic.  She didn't attend this meetup though.

See?  I really did go out!

The outdoor picture was taken by me, with my camera sitting on my car, after the meet.

Last weekend, I met with a "civilian" game group and a trans group, both meeting people for the first time. 

My relative nervous levels:
Civilians: high.   People I don't know, and I don't know how they'll react to someone they're really not expecting.  But I had an ally there.

GLBT: medium-high.  People I don't know, going solo, people who might have an agenda I do not share.

Trans: medium.  People I don't know, and may have formed cliques that I won't be able to break in to.  (Not their fault; I've mentioned that I'm a classic introvert before).

Stories to come.

Just Funny

I don't post enough Dilbert.  Scott Adams is a master at putting two laughs in four panels.  Here's an example from the end of last year.

How do you know when you're done?  In the 21st century, it's probably when whatever you were doing on your cell phone is done.

Oh, what the heck.  Here's some more Dilbert:

I Need to Read More Shakespeare

I've never read Twelfth Night.  I do suspect there aren't a lot of reindeer in the play.

Stiletto Economics

I know Lenore Skenazy through the Funny Times, one of my must-reads every month.  You might know her as the mom who let her 9 year old son ride the New York subway alone.

I'm not sure how I found this column, but it deals with the type of fashion that I think appeals to a lot of us, both to wear and admire: high high heels.

Was it a hooker convention?

No, I know for a fact it wasn't, because I had been invited, too. It was simply a suburban bat mitzvah — a coming-of-age party for a sweet eighth-grade girl and her hooker friends. Er ... her fashionable 13-year-old friends in their 5-inch high heels. (And 5-inch skirts. But that's another story.)

Apparently not content to simply tower over 13-year-old boys on their own two feet, the girls donned stilettos to approximate the models in the magazines. But little do those girls realize they also are approximating the leading economic indicators.

You can read the whole fun and clever story here.

Letters. We Get Letters. Lots and Lots of Letters (part II)

Someday, I'll learn to not underestimate my readers.  I said "nobody will get the letters reference.  Everybody did."  And I guess it started with Como, but Dean Martin used to use it on his show sometimes, and the most recent time I heard it (it was still a while ago) was on Saturday Night Live.

And my mother used to like Perry Como (and "Sing Along With Mitch") so I'd watch it too when I was a tiny tot.  That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Penny Clare added a comment to my clear nail polish post which I'll copy here in case you missed it:

Be VERY careful with the Nail Envy. It has ruined my nails - I am having to wait for them to grow out. They have become weak and pitted and brittle. Really nasty to look at without some kind of clear coat. If you notice ANY change in your nails you don't like, stop using OPI right away. I waited far too long because I loved the pale pink top coat. Penny p.s. I think Revlon 955 base coat may be better, but only time will tell.

The OPI product has worked fine for me.  Some reviews say the gloss is minimal or absent, but mine look good.  I know there are lots of ways to mess up my nails (Nair-type products seem to do a number on them, for instance) and I wanted y'all to be aware of her experience.  You all know that everybody's body acts and reacts differently to chemicals.  I'd suggest you follow Penny's advice generically: if you notice ANY change, stop using that product.

And if you were expecting my usual overlong posts, use the extra time to check out Penny's blog.  She's a British HHG fan and cute.

Simple Pleasures: Trying On II

(the poll is almost closed.  Every vote counts!  Next weekend, Charity and I will be going to a T group meeting.  I suggested we do the matching dress thing again.  Should we?)

Last week, I wrote about wearing earrings around the house because they really need a long time-test to ensure comfort.

Shoes have the same issues.  Interestingly, I can tell if men's shoes will be comfortable after just a short time.  Women's shoes... not so much.  I need to try shoes for comfort for several hours of standing and walking before I hit the street (that sounds bad, but I can't think of a better way to phrase it).  On days when I'm wearing tights, even if I don't change, or don't change fully, if it's convenient, I put on a different pair of heels.  In addition to putting aside the painful ones, I have a spreadsheet with information about each pair.  I rate each pair:
* wonderful.  Well, I have yet to find a pair I'd feel comfortable wearing all day and night, but a couple of pair are close.
* good for x hours.  I try to estimate how long it will be before I say "enough!" and put that in the spreadsheet.
* not really good.  I want to wear these shoes!  They're beautiful and painful but maybe I can wear them for an hour outing.  Maybe.
* no ****ing way.  These go to the swap; maybe someone else  can make them work.

I have swapped a few pair that I'd miss if my memory was better.

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Letters. We Get Letters. Lots and Lots of Letters

(and NOBODY is going to get THAT reference!)

Please take my little poll.  Charity and I will be going to a t-event this coming weekend.  Should we repeat the matching dress routine?

My Birchmere Epilogue prompted a comment from Marian (whose post inspired my post).  She wrote about the dressing euphoria wearing off and dressing being 'normal;' I said, for me, it's still both euphoric AND normal.

In her comment, Marian said being Marian "would always be special, and better than being in drab. But I'm not sure if it would be as much of a high as it was when new."

I wonder if it ever reaches that point.  I wonder if I'd just not bother dressing if there wasn't the rush I feel now ~ but I think I would.  And I think I'd go further to keep that high.

That's why I'm looking for new venues and experiences.  I have limits to what I'll do (sorry, gentlemen! :D ) but I will keep crossing the great wall that surrounds my comfort zone.

I've mentioned before that wearing panties under my "normal" clothing was difficult the first time.  I checked my pants several times a day to make sure I didn't split a seam and someone could see (gasp!) panties under my pants!  Now it's normal.  At first when I'd wearing pantyhose, I wore socks over them, until I realised that if anyone could see over my sock they'd see I was wearing something hard-to-explain on my leg.  Tights are a several-times-a-week item now, in a variety of colours and patterns.  I always wear a cami under my shirt.  If my shirt will support it, I'll wear a thin-strap and/or lace cami.  If my shirt and cami will support it, I'll wear a bra under everything.  Today I'm wearing purple except for my black slacks and sneakers, beige cinch, and white bra: tights, lace cami with thin adjustable straps, panties, shirt.  Only the shirt comes from the men's department.

And by "support it," I mean I take a critical look at my shirt in the mirror and ensure I can't (or can barely) see my undergarments.  I make no effort to hide my tights.

Marian wrote, "[r]ight now, everything is new."  I try to keep everything new by doing something I hadn't done before.  Sometimes I wonder if I should go slower with new things so I can wait for the "normal" mindset to appear and then find something newer but I don't really control the rate of change.  I do things when they occur to me.  Well, that's not really accurate.  I do things some indeterminate amount of time after they occur to me.  Sometimes, I have to mull over whether my new idea is a good one, or at least a safe one.

I had a great time at the Birchmere.  I have an opportunity to go out this Sunday and next weekend, meeting new groups of people each time.  I'll impose on Charity to help with my makeup and wardrobe choices and I'm sure when I'm out it'll feel "normal."

And euphoric.

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