Moving Out

(Since I was doing "Therapy Thursday," I thought I'd continue with my non-t life on Thursday.  If you're looking for t-content, there is only a smidgen at the end.)
 
The movers are coming tomorrow, so I'll probably be off the air for a day.

The whole experience has been very humbling.  I feel like a failure moving out.  I mean, I should be able to make something work, given almost twenty-five years to make it work.

And now that I've decided it may be time to move on, I'm getting confirmation from odd and diverse people.  

I told a couple of (male) friends ~ both responded with "congratulations."

I told a good female friend and she was nothing but encouraging.  In fact, I adapted this post from an e-mail I sent her earlier this week.

My wife told my sister we were having problems, and my sister called to suggest that, if I'm moving out, I shouldn't tell my mother.  I asked my wife "why would she say that?" and she admitted telling me that she told my sister I'm getting an apartment.  She said it like "of course I told you that."  I told her what my sister said about keeping it a secret and my wife said "that makes sense.  It'll kill your mother."  After we told the kids, I told her I'd tell my mother when I called because I don't want the boys to have to keep secrets.  She said "you should tell her."  I said "I thought you didn't want me to."  She said "I never said that."  I said "you said 'it'd kill her.'"  She admitted to that, but said "that doesn't mean you shouldn't tell her."  Doesn't it now?  It either means "don't tell her" or "dibs on the silverware."

I couldn't tell the kids at home because "they'd always remember where they were" when I said "we're having a trial separation?"  Really?  Give me a break.  We went to IHOP and I told them there.  She had to be present to make sure I didn't say "good luck with the nut" or something.  (For the record, I am very careful with what I say to the boys.  The prime directive is NO dissing.) 

My oldest and I went into DC to see Stephan Pastis (he's a big fan).  (I reminded myu wife in the morning that we were going and she said "he may not want to go."  Right again.)  On the drive into DC, I asked if he and his brother talked about the little bombshell ~ he said no.  I asked what he thought and he said "I expected this for at least 3 or 4 years now."

My mother's reaction: "I expected this for a long time."  AND she asked if I had a girlfriend.  I told her I'm getting a new stick because I broke the old one beating the ladies off. :D

I think I was the last person to know.  I should have done my sabbatical ten years ago, but then my oldest boy would have been 9 and it would have broken his heart.  He was always sensitive, and always my boy.  I remember when he was six or so and everyone came to the airport to see me off.  When he realised I was getting on a plane and he wasn't, he burst into tears.  I was so touched I almost didn't go.

 I've moved a ton of stuff, and a mover will move the rest of the boxes and some furniture.  My wife all but insisted I take the living room set (probably so she can buy another set).  I'll buy a bedroom set.  FiOS is in.  I need to get to another furniture store (I want to check 3).  I can get a serviceable bedroom set for about the price of twenty-five dresses.  I my stay through Saturday, because my son likes my Saturday breakfast and we can have Friday night dinner (we do some Jewish rituals) together.

I expect to be wearing skirts more than slacks in the apartment.  Even if I'm not dressed fully, I plan to dress comfortably.  And for me, comfortable means a skirt and a pretty top.

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