Monday, December 30, 2013

This Space Intentionally Left Blank

Things are happening here, and I think I need to take a few days off.  I'll probably be back by the weekend ~ look for the funnies.  And to keep you laughing until then, read this.

Have a wonderful, fun, and safe New Years.  I resolve to get out more, to improve my femulation, and to let Meg get to know more new people in 2014.

Sunday, December 29, 2013

Christmas Countdown ~ Christmas Letdown

A few follow-up comics: The Duplex, Flying McCoys, and Bound and Gagged.

Good answer!

turnabout is...

that would be me
Almost the perfect gift

Not gone well.

Saturday, December 28, 2013

His and Hers

Ballard Street.  No other comment.

Friday, December 27, 2013

Hair and Thair ~ Private Eyelashes

Check out Alice's comment on yesterday's post.  It turns out the hair growth is not as odd as it seems.  But the way it seems is more fun. :)

I recently found a two-page ad for a new product called Latisse.  Latisse is a prescription "treatment" to grow eyelashes "longer, fuller, darker."  They even adopted a word for what they're treating: hypotrichosis ("inadequate or not enough lashes" is their definition.  I don't think it's life-threatening).

I'm interested in longer lashes.  I think most women are interested in longer lashes, although I can't find a good evolutionary reason for that.

The front of the ad is a large picture of a woman and a close up of her eyes at start of treatment, after 16 weeks, and after 16 weeks with mascara.  I suspect week 0 with mascara would look similar to the week 16 with mascara.

There is a bit of large-font text to catch your (presumably sadly, eyelash-deficient) eyes.  Then comes the smaller text.  The bottom third or so contains Important Safety Information.

Excerpts (taken from the website so the phrasing is different, although similar):

LATISSE® solution use may cause darkening of the eyelid skin which may be reversible. LATISSE® use may cause increased brown iris pigmentation of the colored part of the eye which is likely to be permanent. While very infrequent, increased iris pigmentation has occurred when LATISSE® was administered.

It is possible for hair growth to occur in other areas of your skin that LATISSE® frequently touches. Any excess solution outside the upper eyelid margin should be blotted with a tissue or other absorbent material to reduce the chance of this happening. It is possible for a difference in eyelash length, thickness, fullness, pigmentation (darkness), number of eyelash hairs and/or direction of eyelash growth to occur between eyes (e.g., results may vary for each eye). These differences, should they occur, will usually go away if you stop using LATISSE®.
  • Do not apply in the eye or to the lower lid.
  • Only use the sterile applicators supplied with LATISSE® to apply the product.
  • Don't allow the tip of the bottle or applicator to touch fingers or any other unintended surface, as contamination by common bacteria is known to cause infections.
  • Remove contact lenses prior to applying LATISSE®. Contact lenses may be reinserted 15 minutes afterward.
  • Remember, if you stop using LATISSE®, lashes will gradually return to their previous appearance.
 Also: be careful if you're taking anything for eye pressure.  Only apply to the base of the upper eyelash.  Hair may grow in places the drug frequently touches.

Then page two of the ad is pretty much a FAQ with warnings interspersed among instructions.

I think I'll pass.

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Hair and Thair ~ Is There a Doctor in the House?

This may sound silly.  I often ask questions others don't seem to think about.  For instance, if a dog has black fur it's called a "black dog."  Why isn't a person has black hair called a "black person?"

That's just an aside.

I think too much about hair.  It's one of the big differences between the genders.  A woman trying to pass as male might want to add sideburns or facial hair and lament that her arm hair is thin.  A man trying to pass as a woman will work hard to remove or bleach body hair and shave facial hair as close as possible.

Let's consider arm hair.  (Most body hair works the same way, for this thought exercise.)  It grows to, say, an inch long, and then stops.  Just let it sit there and it just... sits there.

I know hair has a lifetime and it will eventually fall out and be replaced, but it's not a very short lifetime.  It's weeks or months, not days.

Yet if you shave it off, it will grow back pretty much immediately.

Shaving is not particularly intrusive.  It's not like epilating or tweezing or using chemicals to remove the hair or otherwise irritate the follicles.  It's simply cutting off the dead part above the skin.  But if you shave it will grow back quickly and stop at the same length as before.

Why does it do that?  How does it know that it's been shorn and needs to grow back?

Is there anyone who understands the biology involved and can explain this to me?

Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Christmas Countdown ~ MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Merry Christmas or Happy Day Off Day (take your pick).  Uncle Bonsai does a great song called "Doug's Greatest Christmas Ever," about how Doug's importance is elevated on Christmas by virtue of being the office Jew.

Q: what did the fourth, forgotten wise man say?
A: "I thought we agreed....  NO GIFTS!"

Also please enjoy a marvellous variation on Noel.

Christmas Countdown ~ Animal Edition

Click to Enjoy

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Christmas Countdown ~ ONE

One each: Dog Eat Doug, Speedbump, The Duplex, and Real Life Adventures,
Click to enjoy.  Elf mantra.
Not so wise!  They have it backwards!  But he wanted to make the "year one" joke
Speaking of Wise Men...

Monday, December 23, 2013

Christmas Countdown ~ TWO

Two Bound and Gagged, one Shoe, one Zits.
White knuckle flier ~ red nose flier.

That would be me

I still don't like piercings

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Christmas Countdown ~ THREE

It's those McCoy boys again.  Yesterday, it was The Duplex; today it's The Flying McCoys.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Christmas Countdown ~ FOUR

No trans cartoons today. We'll stick with the holiday theme.

Friday, December 20, 2013

Christmas Countdown ~ FIVE

If you're not a comics fan, come back on the 26th.

I'm going to start my countdown with three "close but not quite" cartoons.  Only the first is clearly holiday related, but it's... a bit off.  The captions explains why.  Click to enlarge.

What gives me the right to declare myself comics critic?  Remember:  Those who can do.  Those who can't teach.  Those who can't teach, teach gym.

Clearly, they should have found 10,000 defective (eg) Blitzen toys.
Rudolph was "the most famous reindeer of all"
so it doesn't make sense ~ Grimmy just said he was recalled.

Close, and funny, but the affirmation should be
"I will run out of paper" or "I want to run out of paper."

Pastis is usually better than this.  He should have found a way to
make that "knockers."  The last panel is a bit of a save though.

Thursday, December 19, 2013


In response to my post about my wayward contact, two readers pointed out that wearing contacts in one mode, and glasses in the other assist the disguise.

I've often thought about long hair.  I have several friends who wear their natural, long hair when dressed.

Back in my teens and twenties, my hair was quite long ~ definitely girl length.  It was never super long.  It did go below my shoulders, and I had my hair permed for a couple of years.  Sometimes, I wish I had a full head of hair now.  I'd probably let it grow as long as it wanted to, and try to style it so I could wear it in a male or female manner.

But when I get dressed, my wig is the final component.  Often, I look in the mirror and think I see my male self looking back, even with contacts.  But once I put on my hair and smile on, that changes.  Different hair is definitely a key part of the transformation.

Obviously, the body changes but people don't identify other people via body shape.  Well, I do sometimes, but I'm a special case.  I see three facial areas that help to keep people from realising that Bonnie and Ben are the same person.  (Voice is important, but I'm not going into that now.)

contacts vs glasses: people may not notice if you get new glasses; they will if you put on glasses for the first time, or take them off for the first time.  It makes a difference.

makeup: makeup can contour your face and change the shape, but even basic makeup can make a huge change.  Like glasses, eye shadow and liner make your eyes look different.  Lipstick causes focus to shift when viewing a face, which can result in looking at the target differently and not making the connection.

hair: play with one of the on-line hair styling programs and your photo.  Or look at a photo shoot in a woman's fashion magazine.  You'll see the same woman a dozen times, except each time she's transformed from who she was before.

The odd part is, I can't figure out which of those three are key.  I certainly don't look female if I put on contacts; I still look mostly like myself, whether male or female.  It's a small change that can change the opinion of the viewer, if she knows your male self and just met your female one.

Sometimes makeup makes me look female, sometimes not.  Putting on a wig first... well, if you squint and stand far enough away, maybe. 

There's an old Who song called "Disguises."  Since I started thinking about this post, I've been thinking about this song and hearing it a different way.  The chorus:

You're wearing disguises
Occasionally a girl surprises me
When she turns out to be you
Wearing disguises

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Gender Check

I saw this last summer in FAO Schwartz in Manhattan.

I think she looks kinda masculine.  Is it my imagination?

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Mommas Got A Brand New Bag

Dakine 8220-100, "Christin"
I bought a new handbag.  I wasn't planning on it, but I wanted something small that I could use for possible overnight getaways.  I went to Marshall's, knowing I could probably find a small suitcase there.  I did, but not one (a) small enough or (b) easy to carry.  I considered a backpack, but the last time I tried one I discovered that my rotator cuffs don't rotate as well as they should and it was hard to get on and off.  Plus, being from The Big City, I'm reluctant to have things that might contain valuables where I can't see them.

So I started looking at the handbags and found one that had a shoulder strap, probably long enough to put over my opposite shoulder (see Big City Paranoia).  It's shaped like a doctor's bag so it has room on the bottom.  I had concidered just using my tote, but the tote is tall and thin and doesn't seem to have as much room inside.  I didn't find it on the Dakine web site but they had similar bags for $55, which is what the tag said the "suggested retail" was.  Ebay had one for $48.

I put it over my shoulder to see how it feels as I looked at other bags.  A woman with a Jamaican accent deadpanned to me "nice purse."  Instead of saying what I should have ("yes, and I have the perfect outfit for it!") I said I was looking for a small overnight bag and I think I found it.  She nodded and moved on.  For the record, her delivery seemed more judgmental than friendly which is why I skipped the "outfit" crack.

Bonus: how to pack light:

Skip the girl stuff.  Girl clothes are lighter, but the accessories will kill your back.  Plus, I'd probably need a couple of choices for a second day, and maybe different shoes.

Girl dressing is always better, but sometimes not as practical.

By the way, the bag had a clearance tag and was $16.

Monday, December 16, 2013

More On Mott

Some readers mentioned that Mott, my opal ring, is just fine with some scratches.  It lends some character to the ring.

The scratches are more rough spots than scratches, the kind that will snag on, say, fabric if they come into contact.  Unless I can file or sand them down somehow (or find someone who can) I can't wear it.  I play with my rings/bracelets/whatever I'm wearing.  When I had long hair, long ago, I'd bite on the ends.

Normally, playing with my ring is a mindless activity while I'm doing whatever it is I'm supposed to be doing.  But the rough spots will distract me.

Music is a good analogue.  I can leave music on when I'm working and listen and do other things.  But if I have to focus on something, the music will just play and I won't have any idea as to how many songs or how long it's been playing.  If the music is exceptionally loud or soft or discordant (there should be a word "dischordant" just for lousy music), it'll distract and I can't work.

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Sunday Funnies ~ Arlo and Janis AGAIN

Have I ever mentioned the website commonly known as CIDU?  This is one of the first sites I enjoyed regularly, and I go back to the beginning of the web (even before).  CIDU is Comics I Don't Understand and I was a regular content provider, sometimes submitting comics I just didn't get, sometimes submitting explanations, always laughing.

Anyway, I'm not completely lost here.  CIDU had a section for risque or possibly risque (hey, the point was he didn't get the joke) cartoons called the "Arlo and Janis Page" since Arlo & Janis seemed to show up there more often than anybody else.

I've posted A&J at least a dozen times, but I have a few more.  One was borderline "gender" (ie, Saturday) material.  The last three are a sequence and absolutely great!


I tried.  It didn't work for me.

Hence the A&J page

Saturday, December 14, 2013

What Is the Meaning of "Sick" Anyway?

This has been sitting in the queue for a year or two.  It still makes me laugh.  Speedbump, by Dave Coverly.

I feel like I should take offense, but it's funny

Friday, December 13, 2013

Fuzzy Thinking

First, an alert:

Friday the thirteenth falls on a Friday this month!  Those are the worst kind!

Second, a note to darling415 who asked where she can get Swarovski clip star earrings like I picked up at the Metropolitan Museum of Modern Art in Manhattan.  Alas, Swarovski no longer sells them and I couldn't find any other source for them.  I'm not surprised; they were in the clearance section.

I have not been sleeping well lately.

A few nights ago, as I was just fading back to sleep, around 3am, I heard a serious bell nearby.  This is one of those old-fashioned bell sounds where the little hammer beats against a half-circle at a high rate of speed.

Once I figured out it was a fire alarm, I actually spent a few seconds wondering if I should get dressed or go out in my nightie, just pulling a jacket over it.

I woke enough to decide the smart (and fast) thing to do was to shed my nightclothes and pull on pants, shirt, sneakers, jacket, and umbrella, and head for the stairs.  The umbrella was because I had glanced out the window and noticed the ground was wet.

follow up:
The fire was small and five floors below me. The rain had stopped.  The weather was surprisingly warm for a DC-area November night.  And the firemen waved us back in only 45 minutes later.  That was it for my night's sleep though.

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Alas Poor Mott

A couple of weeks ago, I was carrying a desktop computer and a canvas bag with a drive dock and tools, heading towards a client.  As I was stepping onto the driveway, I apparently forgot how to walk.  I did one of those slow-motion falls where I said to myself "this isn't right.  I think I can recover from this.  Nope."  And I fell to my right.  I was smart (or prescient) enough to have put the computer back in the original box and I was carrying it on my left side so it tipped and hit the pavement but the computer was fine.  The bag acquired some holes and my little tool kit (which can use replacing anyway) got damaged.

My hand also acquired holes in several places, as did my knee.  And jeans.  Nothing serious; mostly, it was superficial and abrasions.  I had to try to not bleed on the new computer while setting it up.

I had my opal ring on my right hand and I was pleased to see it survived.

The next day, I touched the ring and saw that I was wrong.  It has several scratches right near the opal.

I don't think it's fixable*.  And I really liked that ring.

* OK, it's probably fixable.  But the ring was quite inexpensive and not worth fixing.

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Paging Rodney Dangerfield

I went for a makeup consultation.  I asked the technician what season I was.  She said "hurricane."

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Wrong On So Many Levels

From a Malaysian newspaper:

The opening paragraph basically says "everyman would be a transvestite if it wasn't so dam expensive."  The meds should be regulated to discourage "unhealthy" activity.  The currency equivalences are mine, about $.31 per RM.

Maybe they should look at reducing the price of clothes so all of the t-wannabes can follow their dreams.  Or they should look at whatever's in the water that makes them want to crossdress.

Cheap Medicines Encourages Transvestism

GEORGE TOWN, Nov 28 (Bernama) -- The availability of cheap hormone pills is said to be among the factors that encourages transvestism as well as competition among them.

A former transvestite, Mohd Khariri Ramli, 36, or fondly known as "Erin", said hormone pills, like Marvelon and Mercilon, commonly used by tranvestites for breast enlargement, cost only between RM9 [USD2.79] and RM10 [USD3.10] and could be bought at the pharmacies.

"Besides that, injection for collagen, hormones, vitamin C and B and implant which has a faster effect can also be easily obtained for as low as RM20 [USD6.20] and much cheaper if you are a regular," he said when met by reporters at a forum for former transvestites at the Universiti Sains Malaysia campus here Thursday.

He suggested the relevant authorities to regulate sale of such medication to avoid them from being used for unhealthy activities.

Mohd Khariri, a teacher in Klang, Selangor, said he was a transvestite for 17 years, during which thousands of ringgit was spent, including for cosmetic surgeries, to make him look "beautiful" before he realised his mistakes and returned to the right path.

It was then that he decided to remove all the implants and collagen in his body.

"The pain was excruciating. Only God knows, but I took it as a punishment which I have to bear for changing His creation," he added.

He is now active in programmes to instill awareness among students in schools and institutions of higher learning on the dangers of transgender.

Monday, December 9, 2013


Meg wears contacts.  Her male counterpart rarely does.  This is probably due to the fact that I can't wear them for long periods and I'd usually want to put them on in the morning and take them off at night and I don't want to have to take them off during the day.

Plus, as Meg, I can carry a contact case, my glasses, and contact solution in my purse.  That's no so easy when in drab.
Meg's baby blues

The contacts are supposed to be good for a month.  When I got them, I told the optometrist that I didn't wear them every day; she said I should wear them for as long as they're good.  I pressed for something more specific and she said "you'll know; things will get fuzzy."

Well, I don't know and I probably keep the contacts way too long.

A couple of outings ago, I came home and removed my shoes and wig and contacts, in that order.

The first contact came out fairly easily, except it bounced out of my fingers and leapt away.  I started looking in the sink, on the counter, on the carpet, even on myself to see if it stuck to me.

No sign of the lens.

I figured this was a sign that it's time to change lenses and I tossed the other one out.

The next time I went out, I opened a new pack of lenses and they felt good and I had a nice, clear night out.  I came home and was about to pop out my lenses when I noticed something small and almost clear on the wall.  I have no idea how it decided to not only hit the wall but cling there, but I still believe something was trying to tell me to get new lenses and that the only way I'd switch was for the current lens to hide.

Sunday, December 8, 2013

The Real(?) McCoy

I haven't had any of Glenn McCoy's The Duplex in about three months.  He's due.

Click to enjoy.

Saturday, December 7, 2013

Facts Is Facts

I've posted Fuscos before, but this is the first Saturday-worthy one I've found.  The Fusco Brothers have a somewhat limited repertoire, but Duffy makes the most of them.  This is a riff on Rölf on yet another first date....  Although the dates always look pretty much the same.  It reminds me of old radio shows like Gunsmoke or Space Patrol where the same actors show up as someone different each episode.  On Gunsmoke, it was the same person playing a different young male; on Space Patrol it was a different villain.  The odd thing was, one of the guys who played multiple villains was Bela Kovacs, who had a very distinctive accent.  So most of the bad guys came from the same region, I guess.

click to enlarge

Friday, December 6, 2013

20 Nov 2013 ~ The Service

The service was nice.  The minister spoke this year; in the past, women who were close to home on the issue of trans-violence spoke.  She added details to most of the people pictured in the bulletin.

They recited a few lines from Benedictus, a marvellous song by The Strawbs.

There was a table with a candle for each victim of fatal violence.  They had different members of the congregation recite each victim's name and snuff out the candles.  Then each candle was re-lit.

There was a snack after the service.  We didn't stay.  I did stop for a minute to speak to the minister, who remembered me from previous years.

I can't understand how someone can harm or kill someone else simply because they're living their lives.

I've tried.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

20 Nov 13 ~ At the Church

We entered the church and I saw JoAnn, who I knew and actually recognised.  She was sitting front

Unassuming church in the background
and center; I wanted to be closer to the back so we went to the right and found two seats.  Charity saw a couple of people she knew.  I said "I don't know anybody."  I was referring to my face recognition issue, but at that the woman in front of us turned around, introduced herself, and said "now you do."  We had a nice chat and then I left them to talk while I went to say hi to JoAnn.
I had noticed JoAnn was talking to a couple of women right behind her so after we spoke a bit I asked softly "do I know the women behind you?"  She said yes, and that I had met them at her house.  So I said hi (they remembered me) and went back to my seat as the service started.

There was a woman sitting to my left wearing a white dress.  I didn't get a chance to talk to her, but if I did, I would have mentioned that she looked just like a woman (gg) I used to work with.  I wish I had.  I know I'd consider that a high point of my day to be told I looked just like a woman someone knew.

Brief explanation: even though I have trouble with faces (or maybe it's a consequence) I often point out someone who looks like someone else, and I often get a "you're right.  I hadn't noticed" reply.  It's an odd talent, and it would be more useful if I had a larger pool of Faces I Know to relate to.

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Simple Pleasure ~ Saving Nails

Last month, I wrote about my frustration with splitting my thumbnail while trying to hold the lobster claw clasp open when putting on a necklace or bracelet.  Marian suggested an easy solution: there are magnetic clasps.  You add this to the stock clasp.  It has a claw on one end and a hoop on the other.  Simply attach the clasp claw to the hoop on the item and the clasp hoop to the claw on the item and after that, you only need to open and close a magnet.

Of course, if you have several bracelets/necklaces you like to wear, you really need one per and that can run into money ~ money that can be better spent on jewelry.

It turns out there's an easy solution for my favourite necklace.  It's 24" and I wear it most days when in drab.

At 24" there's no need to open it at all.  It just slips over my head.  I was opening and closing it daily for no good reason.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

20 Nov 2013 ~ Getting Ready

And pumps.
There's not much to tell.  I just... got dressed to go out.  Isn't that the way it should be?

I wore a dress I hadn't worn before.  Since it was a church event, I needed to dress up a bit.  I considered a suit but it didn't seem like that sort of church, from my past visits.  I needed a cami under the dress, and I wore plain black tights and pumps.

Charity came with me.  Only a few of the local girls said they were going to the Fairfax event that night.  We arrived about ten minutes early, which was good ~ we had some time to chat.

Monday, December 2, 2013

20 Nov 13

was the Transgender Day of Remembrance.  I joined 40 or 50 people at the same church in Fairfax I'd gone to for three or four of the five years they've been presenting this service.  Here's the program.  You can click to enlarge each page.

Please be safe out there.