Therapy the First

I leave work around the same time most days.  I get on the highway which is designed by maniacs.  The entrance ramp joins with two lanes, which join two other lanes, which join four more lanes.  Then the rightmost five end, one-by-one.  The first exit is at least three miles up the road.

As I committed to the entrance ramp I could see that all nine lanes were completely clogged as far as the eye could see.

When I got to that first exit I took it, but that meant I had to go past some major roads and major backups.  I was about ten minutes late.

My wife was already there and was giving the therapist some background on our families and relationship.

I let her talk, to give the background because I wanted to hear her take on things.  She brought up crossdressing very early on, very matter-of-factly.

We spoke of other issues I won't go into here.  We did keep going back to the dressing, which my wife thinks is key.  Maybe it is.

I did make my point that I would not just like to be more open in my dressing, it's becoming critical to me.  I challenged my wife when she said she understood what it's like.  I said what's becoming a mantra, "closets are for clothes, not for people."  I explained some of what I do ~ going out when on travel and such ~ but only in response to questions.  My wife mentioned my "Christine O'Donnell" costume and said my friend made the comment "he's way too good at this."  I wish I'd heard that before ~ I would have built on that!  And maybe admitted to how I was way too good at this.

My wife also re-asserted that she doesn't want her friends to know.  She told the therapist about her friend, M, who was at the past-life regression where I admitted to being a crossdresser.  I said "and I bet she's never brought it up since."  My wife said "no, but it's awkward."  I think that's in her imagination.

There are a lot of points I did not make.  I will.  Next week, we meet separately: I'll be there Monday, she'll be there Tuesday.  I would have rather reversed that, but this is OK.

At home, my wife was incensed at something the therapist said: she mentioned that we need to examine whether the issues can be worked out or whether it's a dealbreaker.

Frankly, I'm not sure.

Also at home, she asked about how many gg's knew and if I was "attracted" to any of them.  I said "there's always something special about a woman who's accepting, but I'm not planning to jump into bed with any of them, no."

I also straightened out my wife about one thing: I forget the circumstances, (it may have been in relationship to the Sunday school thing) but she said, "well, you're not transgendered!"  I was taken aback, and then interrupted and the conversation ended.  I finally had a chance to explain some terminology to her.  She confused ts with tg.  I would have thought that, as a therapist, she would have the basics down.  She also mentioned not long ago that she thought using "her" for a dressed male was "wrong."

We have far to go.

I need to start making a list of talking points for Monday.

---