Thursday, November 18, 2010

Talk Me Off the Ledge

I'm thinking of sending P either a picture from the clothing swap, or one of me in the six-inch pumps.  Or maybe one from last year's office Halloween dressup.

Maybe I would write "see?  I could've done wingwoman duty."

Just to see what he says.

Or maybe I can just photoshop a rally picture face onto a different picture of my body.  Why?  He'll know it's a fake.  He won't know the body's mine.  I'd consider it a private joke.

Coming out is always a one-way trip.  You go through an exit, not a revolving door.


  1. Meg, I guess it depends on whether it is really the right time to come out. I've been exactly where you are, wanting to come out so badly, but the family circumstances were not ready for that yet. I know it's tempting to let the cat out of the bag to just one person, but think about all you are risking, i.e. your family. That is obviously a personal decision and I can't know your exact situation. For me, I couldn't let myself come out to anyone who knew my male self EVEN A LITTLE (because people just don't keep their mouths shut even if they are trying) knowing it could screw up my relationship with my wife and kids. I hope I'm not being too much of a wet blanket, but I've been following your postings lately with a little bit of alarm, worried that you'll give in to the impulse of outing yourself to someone who may not be receptive and therefore may out you further (accidentally or on purpose) than you are prepared for.

  2. Meg, Sorry, to toss a wet blanket but, I'm concerned about revealing any more. This is not about how your family and friend feel "all about Meg". What if your present or future employer reads or finds this facebook page or blog and traces it to you? You have stated that you travel for the company, representing them..if they think you'ed show up dressed..... Right now, if your employer found these photos it's still "even if you don't like the Idea" a halloween prank. There is nothing wrong with emailing P and dancing around subject having fun at his apprehension of you, with him but, be careful with photos that are not halloween etc. Your email to P should be carefully wrote just in case it gets public.
    The photoshopped idea might work better as still could be considered "not really me".

  3. Meg
    Right now I too am standing on the ledge wanting to come out to my wife but I agree with the other comments that it will be almost impossible to restrict a coming out to one person. You should certainly not show P the photo of you at the clothing swap as you 'are' a woman there with no doubts or uncertanties as to the real you for in the that photo you 'pass' 100%.

  4. Meg
    Add my voice to the above three. I just do not see the risk/reward equation tipping in your favor at this time with P. You know him better than we do and you are in the best position to guage his reaction.
    It would seem hard to take the next step that you are contemplating in a controlled fashion at this point. You know that it is impossible to put the toothpaste back in the tube.
    Understanding our own individual level of gender is difficult. Explaining it to others is even harder.
    You are in a great position to fill in blanks by referring folks to this website. Reading this blog back to front will give anyone who wants to know about Meg a very good idea of who Meg is. When you are prepared to refer P to this blog you will know that he can be trusted with this information. Until then I would sit tight.


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