If She Doesn't Know, She Suspects

And if she suspects, after tomorrow, she'll know.

OK, I'll back up.

One of the women in the office saw me dressed last Halloween, and said something like "this isn't the first time you've done this, is it"? I admitted it wasn't but I think she took that to mean that I'd been out on Halloween before. She didn't ask, I didn't elaborate. I'm still ambivalent.

I'll write about my Halloween at the office soon. She's a key player.

Since then, she's asked to "see pictures" on occasion. I've joked about it ~ "are you sure? Did you get over the trauma of last time?" and "why? Don't you have enough nightmares?". I take a lot of pictures (yes, that's very unusual, I know) and sometimes one or two look OK. But they're scattered around my disk and although I've cropped and made minor edits to a few, most of them are just there for me to enjoy. Or cringe over. Or laugh at.

Then I told my friend Amanda about Meg by way of sending her an e-mail version of my But I Digress post. Yes, this is the same (gg) Amanda who doubted my pedicure. She was incredibly welcoming and I scoured my disk for pictures to send her. I should have expected her approval because she's not only open-minded but also incredibly intelligent and beautiful.

So now I have a folder with a couple of dozen pictures. If I can figure out how, I'll make a photo gallery here. I put them on a flash drive which I guard with my life, at least from my immediate family.

Once I put this together, I asked if my co-worker was still interested in seeing photos. She said she was, but I took off a few days, and then she went on holiday. She' s back, and I just saw her and she said she wants to see the pictures. I told her I have to run, but will be back tomorrow. Well, I certainly had enough time to show her the photos but I decided this is a "sleep on it" occasion. This is a wrong decision. I will be up all night trying to figure out the consequences of adding one more person to my small circle. She's not the quiet type ~ everyone here may know by the time I get back from Texas. She might even call out to other people nearby to see what's on her computer while I'm there.

Maybe I'll tell her I was just teasing about the pictures.

I'll sleep on it.

In these pictures, I have many different outfits, and some different wigs, accessories, shoes. Most are inside my house, but a couple are not. She's a smart woman and I think she'll have no doubts that this is NOT just a costume thing.

I'll see where it goes from there.

I wonder if I should show her my Firefox "persona" as well.

In an e-mail, Sara asked me "how does it feel to come out to people you work with for the first time?" The short answer is "terrifying".

I'll sleep on it. Or try to.